The Don'ts of Transitioing

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If I had to do it all over again, there are some things that I would tell myself not to do when starting my transition. For those of you that are just starting your natural hair journey, I hope this helps!

1.     Don’t Go on a Product Buying Spree on Day 1

You will see a lot of product reviews all over the net. For some products, many naturals will agree that they are awesome. This doesn’t mean that you have to run out to the store the day you decide to go natural to purchase the products. Instead, spend the time doing research on products and determine the type of products you want to try from that information. I stupidly ran to the store on day one to try the products that I had heard so much about. Now I have a cabinet full of things that I will never use again. I have revisited some of these products now that I have more new growth to see how the new growth reacts, but for the most part, a lot of the products that I bought initially contain things that I don’t want to touch hair ever. Don't make the same (costly...) mistake I did.

2.     Don’t Assume that What Works For Someone Else Will Work For You

Each head of hair is different. That means that each head of hair will react differently to different product ingredients, even if two heads have similar hair types. If you know for a fact that your hair doesn’t like Shea Butter (for example), don’t try a product that contains Shea butter just because someone else with the same hair type swears by that product. You are just asking to frustrate yourself. In the beginning, a lot of frustration that I had came from trying products that others swore by but my hair just didn’t like at all because of one of the ingredients.

3.     Don’t Blindly Accept What Someone Else Says to be Fact

Always, always, always do your own research before making a change or trying a particular product on your hair that another person advocated for.  There are tons of people who claim to be natural hair experts on the web so it is extremely easy to blindly follow someone who is a self-proclaimed guru, especially if you are new to the natural hair realm and you don’t really know anything. I blindly followed some “suggestions” and my hair became so matted and knotted that I literally had to cut the knots out. Don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of bloggers and vloggers who are right on the money when it comes to their tips, tricks, and advice. I’m not saying that you need to totally dismiss what others who have been through it said. What I am saying is take something that someone tells you, research it, and then take the advice only if your research backs up what you were told. 

My Essential Transitioning Tools

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There are some hair care tools that are essential to a successful transition. They help minimize the frustration you have with your hair, prevent knotting, and assist with each step of your hair care regimen. What’s even better? These tools are true investments. They can be used not only for you transition period, but also for the rest of you natural hair journey!

Quick Tip: Remaining Motivated During Your Transition

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At one point or another, you are going to be frustrated with your hair during the transitioning period. It's inevitable. Your hair will seem to be more susceptible to matting and knotting during the washing process. Your hair will feel hard instead of soft, and nothing that you do seems to work. You will reach a point where you have absolutely no idea what to do. You will be so tempted to give up that you either pick up the phone and start to dial your stylist in order to make an appointment for a relaxer, or you head to your local BSS to pick up a box of your favorite relaxing system. I've certainly been there. Every long term transitioning kinky curly coily head has been there too. To get myself through these trying moments, I've developed a way to boost my motivation levels in order to keep moving forward.

1.     Focus on the Reason Why You Wanted to Go Natural

As a person who likes to write (and has somewhat of a notebook addiction), the day I decided to go natural I started a hair journal. The first entry that wrote in this journal was a detailed explanation of why I wanted to go natural. At the time, I didn’t really have a purpose for writing it down, but I have found that by re-reading that entry, I have continued to be motivated. Focusing on why you chose to go natural and to transition to begin with will help to re-energize you and give you that extra push to go over those frustration day humps. On a day when you are not frustrated, I suggest that you jot down why you want to go natural and keep it around to re-read on days when frustration levels are at an all time high.

2.     Look for curlspirational kinky, curly, coily heads

As you may have noticed, most, if not all, of my posts begin with a picture of some gorgeous natural locks. These pictures are my curlspirations. It is gorgeous, fabulous natural hair that makes me want to see the potential that my natural texture has. These provide daily inspiration for me to keep moving forward. Find pictures of natural hair that is just fabulous to you and place it on a natural hair vision board in a place that you can look at daily. A vision board is a poster  that contains all of your aspirations. It can be theme specific, such as natural hair, or broader than that, such as what you want to accomplish in 5 years. By looking at this board daily, you will be motivated to continue moving forward to reach your natural hair dreams.

3.     Scour Your Favorite Natural Hair Blog

One of the biggest motivations that you can have on frustrating days is looking at the story of someone else who is either transitioning at the same time as you, or has already successfully transitioned. Seeing someone else who has already gone through the process and has endured through the frustrating moments is extremely motivating. It gives you the mentality that “if they can make it through, then I can too.”

Giovanni Smooth as Silk Conditioner Product Review

This is the deep conditioner that I have been using since the start of my transition. I thought I should tell you all about the product that I’ve been using before I start trying new things for DC.

PRICE: Just like its counter parts, this will run you about $8 for an 8oz. I found a 33.5oz bottle for just $13 at Marshalls.

PRODUCT CLAIMS:  “Smooth as Silk Deeper Moisture Conditioner makes your hair feel so smooth, so silky, so amazingly detangled. It works only where needed to create a silky-smooth palette that’s repaired, renewed, and aredy for you own unique kind of style.”

INGREDIENTS: Like most of the other products from this brand, the ingredients are absolutely delectable. What I love most is that the first ingredient listed after water is Rosemary Extract. Rosemary extract is known for stimulating hair growth. What kinky curly coily head doesn’t want that? Like all products from Giovanni, this product does contain protein, so for all you protein sensitive heads out there be weary.

MY EXPERIENCE: In all honesty, it took about a month before I really started seeing a difference in my hair. (Proof that you have to use a product for a little bit to see what it can really do for you). My hair was softer once I rinsed it out in the beginning, but it wasn’t nearly as soft as it is now. Now when I put my hair in 4 big twists to DC, by the end of the 30 minutes my hair is so soft that the twists untwist themselves. Even after I rinse the conditioner out, my hair remains extremely smooth and soft to the touch. This product gives EXCELLENT slip, which makes it a dream to detangle with. Additionally, my hair does seem to have a little more shine to it after I rinse it out (not a significant difference, but a difference none the less).

FINAL THOUGHTS: I like this conditioner (obviously since I’ve been using it for the past 8 months lol). One of the great things is that this DC not only increases moisture in the hair but it also has some protein, which my hair loves. This product will certainly stick around for a while, but I prefer to use a product that was meant to be a deep conditioner (this is meant to be a rinse out conditioner).  I am certainly still open for trying other deep conditioners.

FTC Disclaimer: I was not paid for this review. I purchased this product myself. All opinions are my own

Moisturizing Transitioning Hair

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Moisturizing your hair is an important element to any hair care regimen, including transitioning hair care regimens. Ideally, you should moisturize your hair every 2 to 3 days between washdays.  This simple task, however, is no easy feat for transitioning curlys like me.

Although water is the best moisturizer, it certainly isn’t ideal for transitioning hair unless you intend on resetting your hair every 2 to 3 days. My transitioning hair care regimen only allows me to manipulate my hair about once a week. So having to wet and reset my hair about 3 times a week is just not an option. As an alternative, I tried a number of different moisturizing lotions. Every product I tried stripped my hair of moisture rather than restoring moisture to my hair. I needed to do something different to keep my hair soft and moisturized through out the week.

Thankfully, I found an answer to my dilemma: oils. Certain oils have the ability to penetrate the hair shaft and moisturize the strands. I tried Africa’s Best Herbal Oils (ABHO) mostly because it only costs about $2 a bottle and I used to use it when I was younger. (Who says great hair care products have to cost you a fortune?) The oils contained in this practically wholly organic mixture aren’t exactly penetrating, but it did enough to see if oils are the solution to my problem. So far so good! My hair retains it shine, and remains soft throughout the week. 

Once I finish the bottle of this product, I will try both coconut oil and olive oil. Both oils have been proven to have deep conditioning properties. Although I still have some experimenting to do as far is which oil is best for me, I think this is the solution to my dilemma. 

What do you do to moisturize your transitioning hair?

The Do's of Transitioning to Natural Hair, Part 2

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In addition to the 5 things that I discussed in part 1, here are an additional 5 things that I would tell myself to do if I were to start the transitioning process all over again.

1.    Get to know your hair.

There is no point in even picking up and trying a product if it contains ingredients that your just does not like. Knowing what your hair likes and dislikes will make your hair shine! Getting to know your hair will take some experimentation, but don’t get discouraged. Pay close attention to how your hair responds to certain products and take note of it. This brings me to my next tip…

2.     Appreciate your hair for what it is.

Your hair is unique. There will never be another who has hair that is exactly like yours. So rather than hoping and wishing that your hair acts or looks like someone else’s, appreciate your hair for what it is.

3.    Be patient.

Hair grows on an average of half an inch per month. No faster, no slower. There is nothing that you can do to speed this up (well unless you’re pregnant, then your hair will grow a whole lot faster).  Take your time and enjoy your hair for what it is during every stage of the game.

4.    Trim Regularly.

One of the biggest things that I have noticed, is that the more new growth you have, the easier it is for your relaxed ends to get tangled and matted together. By keeping up with regular trimming, you will be able to cut down on the amount of frustration had from matted, tangled, relaxed ends.

5.    Moisture, Moisture, Moisture!

One of the most important things to remember while transitioning is to keep your hair moisturized. The line of demarcation is extremely fragile and needs to remain moisturized in order to prevent breakage at that point. Moreover, your new curls coming in THRIVE on moisture. Without it, they will become hard and brittle.

The Do's of Transitioning to Natural Hair, Part 1

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There are a lot of mistakes that I made during my transitioning process so far. I did a lot of things on a whim without really thinking about what I was doing or why I was doing it. Needless to say that caused me some frustration. Although I in now way consider myself to be an expert (I'm still learning as I go along), here are some of the things that I would tell myself to do if I were to do this process all over again.

1.    Research, Research, Research!!!

At the beginning of anyone’s transitioning process, there usually isn’t much new growth. Take this time to research any and everything about natural hair and the transitioning process. No matter what anyone tells you, be sure to always conduct your own research. That doesn’t mean that you have to dismiss what was told to you. Use that information as a starting line and see if your research either supports or vacates that information before you act on it.

2.    Keep a hair journal.

This may seem trivial, but it is really beneficial. Keeping a journal of some kind allows you to keep track of what is and what isn’t working for your hair. It will also help you keep track of what you are doing to your hair so that if you try something and get a really great or really bad result you can track what it was that you did. Your hair journal is also a great place to keep all of the information that you researched.

3.    Develop an easy, manageable hair care regimen

Consistent good hair care is one of the best ways to encourage growth and retain length in your hair regardless of whether you are relaxed, natural, or transitioning. To ensure that you are consistently treating your hair in the same manner, a regimen is needed. Think about what your hair needs when creating your regimen and design something around that.

4.    Find and Master at least one transitional style

In my opinion, every person who is transitioning to natural hair should have at least one signature style that you know frontwards and backwards. This is EXTREMELY beneficial. By knowing this style, you will be able to have a quick go to style on even the worst of bad hair days.

5.    Treat all of your hair as if it were natural.

Just because you have two extremely different textures on your head, that doesn’t mean that you have to treat them differently. Since the ultimate goal is to have healthy natural hair, treat all of your hair as if it were natural to further facilitate this end.

This is the first post in a 3 part series regarding this information. Check back tomorrow for part 2!

Transitioning To Me

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So much going right with this picture!

One of the biggest things that I've noticed about myself during my transition thus far is that I have become more accepting of myself. In the past, I have taken so much pride in my hair that my entire mood for the day circled around whether I was having a bad hair day or not. If I was having a bad hair day, everything else would fall to pieces. I wouldn't feel like dressing cute and girly as I usually do. I wouldn't want to spend time primping and slapping on just the right amount of make up to accentuate my features. I wouldn't care if my nail polish was chipping to the point of almost non-existence. I wouldn't even have enough confidence to hold my head up high when I was walking down the street. My hair was my shield and the entirety of my confidence.

The moment I decided to go natural, there was definitely a shift in how I viewed myself. After watching a lot of others on youtube, I knew that the transition wouldn't always be a smooth process. I knew I would have countless bad hair days simply because one of the two textures on my head didn't want to cooperate with the other. Since I couldn't go an entire year moping around, I knew I couldn't hide behind my hair anymore.

At first, this was kind of a scary thought. For as long as I could remember, my hair had been my pride and joy. It was what I got the most compliments on. As time went on, however, I have become more and more comfortable being myself without relying on my hair. I take more pride in other things about myself, and I celebrate and appreciate the features that I was born with. I knew that there was a mental component to the transition to natural hair, but I just didn't expect that it would mean transitioning to me. The last piece of the puzzle is living with the hair that I was created with and I can't wait to see it!

Kinky Curly Knot Today Product Review

Kinky Curly Knot Today Leave-In Conditioner has been raved about across many hair boards, many hair blogs, and many YouTube channels. So when I saw a bottle at my local Whole Foods, I couldn't help but give this product a try.

PRICE:  Just likes its shampoo counterpart, this will cost you about $12 a bottle.

PRODUCT CLAIMS:  The bottle states "Knot Today is a creamy, herbal conditioner and detangler designed to smooth the cuticle and remove knots, snarls, and tangles from thick curly textured hair."

INGREDIENTS: Simply put, these ingredients are amazing! It's wholly organic which provides the hair with yummy nutrients and includes the ingredients necessary to do exactly what the packaging says its going to do. This one is already looking like a winner!

MY EXPERIENCE: Love at first try! This product absorbed really well into my hair. It was something like the perfect consistency of a leave-in conditioner. It's thick enough to provide a whole lot of conditioning power to my hair yet thin enough to not weigh my hair down. Just like the bottle stated, this product made my post-shampoo detangling process extremely easy. It cut my detangling time in half! Each time I used this product, I got the exact same results which is awesome!! I even switched it up midway through my experimentation and went back to using my old leave-in. I could definitely tell the difference. This product also gave GREAT definition to my curls. Remember that very small section of hair that I cut to be fully natural? Well this stuff made it curl and coil right on up! I can only imagine what it would do to the rest of my fully natural hair.

FINAL THOUGHTS: I absolutely ADORE this product!! I have momentarily claimed it to be my staple leave-in conditioner. One of the best things about this product is that a little goes a long way, so the bottle lasts for a really long time, which definitely justifies the price of it. Once my current bottle is empty, I will certainly be purchasing it again!

QFPMS: Giovanni Smooth As Silk Shampoo

When I first decided to transition to natural hair, I immediately went out and purchased new products, all of which had been recommended by others on various blogs and YouTube channels (something I don’t suggest that others do…). One of those first products that I purchased was Giovanni Smooth as Silk Deep Moisture Shampoo. After using it for a while, I can honestly give my thoughts on the product.

PRICE: This will only run you about $8 a bottle. It is sold at most drugstores, including Walmart and Target. This was definitely a HUGE plus for me.

PRODUCT CLAIMS:  The bottle states in part “Smooth As Silk Shampoo has a pearlized formula that glistens in your hand and transforms your hair into a silky palette that’s ready for anything.”

INGREDIENTS: One of my favorite things about this product is by far the ingredients. With loads of yummy treats for your hair, such as Rosemary extract, lavender extract, and Valencia orange extract, it is bound to have some powerful conditioning power on your hair. It also contains vegetable protein. If you are protein sensitive, this may not be a good thing, but my hair loves protein. On the downside, however, this product replaces sulfates with an equally harsh cleaning agent, Sodium C14-16 Olefin Sulfonate. It isn’t, however, in nearly the large quantity as found in most other commercial hair care products.

SB: Want to see what the ingredients in your hair care products are supposed to do? Check out this awesome ingredient dictionary at www.tightlycurly.com/ingredients/. It includes even the most uncommon of ingredients!

MY EXPERIENCE: When I first started using this product, it seemed just like any other shampoo that I used in the past. There wasn’t anything special about it. As time went on, my hair felt a tad drier than I would like after using it, but nothing that a pre-poo treatment couldn’t counteract. 

FINAL THOUGHTS: This shampoo is just ok. There isn’t really anything special about it to me. I’ll continue to use this product until the bottle is empty, but beyond that, I’m not too sure that I would re-purchase it again. If I was in a bind and needed a shampoo immediately, this is a good option, but it definitely isn’t my favorite.

FTC Disclaimer: I was not paid for this review. I purchased this product myself. All opinions are my own.

QFPMS: Kinky Curly Come Clean

One of the first products that I purchased when I decided to transition to natural hair was Kinky Curly Come Clean. I heard tons of good things about the Kinky Curly line, so I decided to give it a try. I headed to my nearest Whole Foods and picked up a bottle. {Note: Kinky Curly is now sold in many Target stores. Check here to see if it is sold in a Target store near you.}

PRICE:  This will run you about $12 a bottle.


PRODUCT CLAIMS: The packaging on the bottles states that "our exclusive blend of mandarine orange extract will gently clean your hair and scalp of buildup while sea kelp will maintain its proper moisture balance. This sulfate-free shampoo is perfect for dry, damaged hair and is gentle enough for daily use."


INGREDIENTS: This is mostly organic product. Since I have decided to use mostly, if not entirely, organic products on my hair, this is a major plus! This product is also sulfate-free which makes me very happy! It does, however, contain c14-16 olefin sulfonate, a cleanser that is known to be somewhat drying. It also contains cocamidopropyl betaine (coconut derived), a very gentle cleanser commonly used to counteract the dryness of harsher cleansers, so my guess is that the ability of the product to retain moisture in the hair while cleansing will vary from person to person (depending on how sensitive one's hair is to harsher cleansers). 


SB: Want to see what the ingredients in your hair care products are supposed to do? Check out this awesome ingredient dictionary at www.tightlycurly.com/ingredients/. It includes even the most uncommon of ingredients!


MY EXPERIENCE:
I first tried this product when I was 3 months into my transition (which means I had barely an inch of new growth...). At the time, I loved this product! It did exactly what it said it would do. It cleaned my hair and left it very soft and moisturized. Since this wholly organic product is on the expensive side (it'll cost you about $12 a bottle), I chose to put it on hold in the cabinet while I tried out other inexpensive shampoos. The next time I tried this shampoo ( a few weeks ago), my results were definitely...different. Instead of feeling completely moisturized like it had before, my hair had mixed results. On my relaxed ends, it felt completely moisturized. On my new growth, however, it felt dry and brittle.

FINAL THOUGHTS: Although this product did make my hair feel drier than I would have liked, it certainly did get my hair and scalp clean. I probably wouldn't use this on a regular weekly basis, but I wouldn't certainly use it for deeper cleanings. I can't quite say whether it would be a staple deeper cleaning shampoo, but it will certainly be in my rotation.


{FTC Disclaimer: I was not paid for this review. This product was purchased by myself. All opinions are my own.} 

Snip, Snip!

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Yesterday afternoon, as I watched youtube videos, I got a little anxious to start playing with my hair. Since I am trying not to manipulate my hair too often in order to limit the stress on the line of demarcation, I usually only play in my hair on wash days. Wash days for me are on Sundays. Yesterady was Friday. Major dilemma.

Instead of fully playing in my hair, I decided to just play with a small piece. I took a very small section of hair directly above my left ear and saturated it with water. As expected, my new growth curled and my relaxed ends went bone straight. Due to the weight of the relaxed ends, my curls were extremely elongated, to the point that it looked more like a deep wave instead of a curl. I was curious to see what it would look like without the relaxed ends, so I picked up my hair scissors and did a little snip, snip. I wet it with a bit more water and added some Kinky Curly Knot Today. My true curl pattern finally made itself known!

This made me eager to cut off the rest of the relaxed ends, but I promised myself to not do it at least until May 2011. That's only 4 short months from now, so I'm going to wait it out. There may just be some other similar snipping in the future!

8 Months Post Relaxer!!!

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Nothing like a little CURLSpiration!!

Last Saturday marked my 8 month post relaxer mark. Looking back at some pictures I took during the first few months of my transition, I can certainly tell the difference in the length of my natural hair. In short, it seems to have grown like a weed! (Pictures to come soon hopefully). One of the biggest things that I've noticed in these 8 months is that my natural curl pattern is slowly but surely starting to rebel against my transitional styles. Usually, my signature twist-rod sets will look like a fresh set for at least 4 days. But now, my new growth starts to revert only after two! My hair still looks decent and all, but when I put my hands in my hair, I can definitely notice the difference between my new growth and permed hair.

I'm really happy with the amount of growth that I have seen over the past 8 months. I now have about 4 inches in the majority of my head (the front of my hair seems to grow a bit slower so its shorter in that area). It still a bit short for my liking at this stage of the game, but it's definitely good to see that my hair is growing. 

I can also certainly tell that it is time for another trim. For me, the more new growth that comes in, the more tangled my relaxed ends become during my washing process. It seems that the only way to rid me of this problem is to trim about an inch or two off. I think that this coming wash day I will do a bit of a trim on my hair, in addition to a clarifying wash and a hot oil treatment.

Well, that's all for now. I am certainly loving my hair at every stage of the game. Can't wait to see my hair in it's full natural state!

Until Next Time,

Quirky Girl

Dear Hair Diary: I Love My 8month post Curly Fro!

{Note: From time to time, when I'm feeling a particular way about my hair, I will post a journal entry in my hair diary. This is the first of those posts! Enjoy!}

My twist-rod sets usually last anywhere from a week to a week and a half. The current set I'm rocking (done last Thursday) is no different. When I woke up this morning, I started my usual routine. I let the steam from the shower give a little moisture to my hair. Once out of the shower and fully dressed, it was finally time to get my hands in my hair (which has become my FAVORITE part of the getting ready process these days). 

I slathered on about two quarter-sized amounts of my favorite oil to moisturize, seal, and impart some shine (I believe my hair does better with oil based moisturizers but I'm still experimenting with that slightly...). A finger fluff here, a little shake there, and I was ready to place my hair accessory on for the day. I chose a blackish silver stretch band that I had picked up from Forever 21 a few days ago. Since I had a lot of damage on my front hairline from my perming days, I try not to use accessories that place a lot of stress on those places. The band that I chose for the day was a little tighter than I would have liked for everyday use, but I figured since I would only be wearing it for the day that it wouldn't be that bad. A few more finger fluffs and I was ready to go. Very little manipulation to my hair (which is ideal for me while I transition) and a total styling time of about 5 minutes. Not too shabby if you ask me. 

Throughout the day, whenever I caught a glimpse of my hair in the mirror I couldn't help but smile. I absolutely LOVE my hair. It was curly, full, and luscious! While my hair is not completely natural yet, I can't wait to see how awesome my curly fro will be. If I'm loving the results now with half curly, half relaxed hair, I can only imagine the results of maybe a bantu knot out on my fully natural hair.

Here are a few more views of my hair today:

Yowzers my lashes look long here! Believe it or not, all I did was put on mascara (one that I've been trying out). Yep, I think that one's a keeper!

The final overall look.

Embracing You as You Are

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One of the biggest things that I've had to come to terms with during my transition to natural hair is me the way that I am created. During the first 3 months of my transition, I did a TON of watching natural beauties on youtube. Since it had only been a few months since my last relaxer, there wasn't enough new growth for me to really get a sense of what my unique curl pattern would be like. So naturally, I hoped and prayed that my curls would be the same as some those youtube ladies that I loved to watch so much. But as my hair began to grow more, and my curl pattern made itself known, I realized that my curls were certainly not like the others. 


Granted, my hair does kink, curl, and coil like some of those youtube naturals, but for some reason what seemed to unanimously work for their hair just didn't work for me. Certain styles and products were just absolute failures. My hair would become a tangled, matted mess to the point where I literally had to cut out some of the knots and tangles. At that time, I was extremely frustrated...and a little envious too. Of course at the time I had heard of the infamous curl envy that overtakes many in the natural hair community, but I just didn't think that was it. But in actuality, it was. I was envious of what others had to the point that I was disregarding what I needed just to get what they had. 


It wasn't until I began to come to terms with the curls that were growing on my head that things really got better. I began to just observe what I needed and cater towards those needs. Yes, I still take a leaf or two from others to get an idea for something, but at the end of the day, my hair is what leads the way in my hair care regimen. Novel idea isn't it? Well it was for me at the time. Embracing what my hair is and not thinking about what it isn't has been a huge pivotal point in my mental transition to natural hair. Much like coming to terms with other aspects that I can't change about myself, I became more proud of my natural texture. There will never be another head of curls quite like mine...and for that I am happy.

The Quest for the Perfect Moisturizing Shampoo: Introduction

Yes, these are actually all shampoos that I have used in the past, including while I was still getting perms. PJ much?! lol

One of the most important things to learn in any hair journey is what your hair likes, what it doesn't like, what it needs, and what it could do without. Now that I am nearly 8 months post relaxer, I have enough new growth to get a feeling for some of the wants, needs, likes, and dislikes of my hair. The biggest need of all is more moisture.                                                            

I have come to learn that my natural hair does not retain moisture well (my relaxed ends on the other hand seem to hold water for days....). It is therefore important for me to create a hair regimen that involves both retaining and restoring moisture to my hair. Because of this need, my ideal hair regimen involves regularly washing with a gentle, moisturizing shampoo.            

As my luck would have it, this seems to be the one product that keeps evading me. The self-proclaimed moisturizing shampoos that I have tried in the past were still harsh, and drying on my hair--the complete opposite of what I want in a MOISTURIZING shampoo. So, now starts the great Quest For the Perfect Moisturizing Shampoo (QFPMS). 
My requirements for this ever elusive product are quite simple. It must be:

1. Sulfate free: Sulfates, such as sodium laureth sulfate and sodium lauryl sulfate, are detergents commonly found in many hair care products. While sulfates are beneficial for those with oilier hair, my hair is on the drier side and doesn't need something this strong to get it clean. As such, I am opting for a much less potent shampoo.
2. completely compatible with my hair (i.e. my hair loves it!)

This is the first post in a series relating to this quest. Other posts in the series will be product reviews on the shampoos that I have tried, including some of the shampoos pictured above. The series will be ongoing until I find a moisturizing shampoo that I love.

{Side Bar: There is a difference between moisturizing shampoos (the one's meant to be used on a regular basis) and clarifying shampoos (the one's meant to be used once every 4 - 6 weeks). I am only looking for my staple moisturizing shampoo at the moment. I also realize that some of the products pictured above do not claim to be moisturizing shampoos. It is merely a picture of shampoo bottles that I had at the time the picture was taken and nothing more.}

My HAIRstory

For as long as I can remember, I have been using that creamy crack to permanently straighten my hair. In fact, up until my tenure at Howard University, I had no idea that there was any other way for a Black woman to do her hair. I assumed that it was a right of passage to Black womanhood, that every 4-8 weeks all Black women traveled to their respective stylists and got a relaxer. Now, of course I saw many women with gorgeous curls and 'fros, but at the time I just assumed that it was a mere styling choice...some sort of a set after their hair was relaxed. Yea, I know, I was rather naive...and possibly in denial.

Quirky Girl Tips: The Mental Transition

I learned rather quickly that transitioning to natural isn't just a physical transformation, it's a mental one as well. Here are a few tips and tricks that helped me overcome those frustrating days when I mentally couldn't handle it.

1. Find Your Natural CURLspiration. There will be days when you really ask yourself, "why am I doing this to myself??". The only way that I have been able to pull through these occasions is to go to my favorite blogs and look over the many natural hair journeys of others. Seeing the before and after shots of these curlicious divas gave me the drive to press on. If they could do it, I could do it too.
2. Be Patient. If you are like me, then when you really want something, you want it right now. Like, RIGHT NOW, right now. When transitioning, there is no snapping of fingers and *poof* kinktastic afro. It takes a lot of time to grow out your straight ends and to obtain your dream length. There is no such thing as a magic product that will miraculously make your hair grow 3 inches in one month. So to get through those impatient moments, I went back to an oldie but a goodie: "Good things come to those who wait." In time and with good hair care practices, your hair dreams will be a reality.
3. Master at least one transitional style. There are TONS of styles to rock on a day to day basis, but every so often, your transitional hair will just not do what you want it to do. Your new growth won't remain sleek enough to blend with your relaxed ends for straighter styles, and your relaxed ends won't curl enough to blend in with your new growth for curlier styles. To keep frustration at bay in times like these, I always go back to my good ole trustworthy style: the twist-n-curl. Knowing this particular style in and out makes it easy for me to fix my hair even on the worst of bad hair days. 
4. Be Confident In Your Hair Plan. You have absolutely no idea the number of times that someone has tried to convince me either to go back to that creamy crack or to do my BC. Although I know that these people have the best of intentions, at the end of the day only I will have to live with my hair. Not anyone else. The only person that knows exactly what would make me happy with my hair is me, so I will not do anything that I know for a fact will not make me happy with my hair. Don't let anyone sway you  into doing something that you don't really want to do. Be confident in what you want and stick with it. 

True Faith

"Faith when everything in your life is going right isn't true faith. True faith makes itself known when everything is falling apart." -Taken from the movie, Amish Grace

Today, I watched a movie about the Amish during a tragedy that struck their community. In the movie, a man, a milk truck driver who took milk from the Amish and transported it to the city to be sold, plotted and executed a plan to murder little girls and then himself. By the time the police arrived, the man had killed 5 little girls and seriously injured many others. Despite the malicious crime that this man committed, the entire Amish community followed their faith and openly forgave him. The story chronicled a woman, the mother of one of the girls who died, struggling with this tenant of her faith. Watching this movie really had me thinking, if something horrible happened to me or to someone I loved, would I be able to put my anger and resentment aside and remain faithful?

The quote from the movie especially resonated with me. It is easy to remain faithful in something--regardless of whether that something is a relationship, a particular career, or a religion-- when everything is going well. The true test of faith really is when everything is falling apart. Is my faith strong enough to withstand the extreme trials and tribulations of life?? If I were to ask myself this same question 10 years ago my answer would undoubtedly be no.

Ten years ago, my parents got divorced. While divorce most certainly isn't the same as the crime committed in the movie, my world at the time was still destroyed. Among the many emotions I had during that time period, the most resounding of them was anger. I was angry with my religion for allowing this to happen. Just 3 years out of Christian school, I was devoutly religious. I did everything that the Bible said that one should do and still, something bad happened to me. In my naivety, I took my anger out on God. Needless to say, my faith at that time was not true. Now that I am older and wiser, I know that everything happens for a reason and that the bad times in life are ways to prepare us to receive and appreciate bigger, better blessings to come. While I know this to be a tenant of my religion, the question still remains: when times are bad for me, will I be able to remain steadfast to my faith? Should something happen to test my faith again, I can only hope that instead of letting all of my ill-feelings overcome me, that I am able to remain faithful in my relationships, in my career, and in my religion.

Has something ever happened to you to cause you to lose faith?

Allow Me To Introduce Myself...

Starting a blog has been on my mind for a while, so in keeping with my theme of trying/starting new things in 2011, I decided to buckle down and just do it already. I am using this blog as an outlet for two things that have become obsessions of mine: 1) rocking my natural hair, and 2) conversing about the random things in life that make me stop and think. I hope that you will be able to learn from my Kinky Curly tales and that you will be entertained by my Quirky view of the world. So friend me, bookmark me, and enjoy!


{Side Note:} No, I am not Erykah Badu, and yes, this picture has absolutely nothing to do with this post...but she is GORGEOUS isn't she??